Pre Hike 8 Paralysis

Days left of work: 0
Days left in CO: 6
Days until my niece's graduation: 12
Days until I'm in VA: 14
Days until I'm on the AT!: 16

Officially, yesterday was my last day of work for three and a half months....that's 3.5 months of...NOT WORKING! A strange thing happens when you realize you'll have no income for a good chunk of time. It's called good old fashioned pure panic. The kind of panic you feel when your fight-or-flight kicks in after someone scares you for no good reason (aholes). The kind of panic you feel when you wake up after a night out and can't find your debit card, but have flashes of the 17 bars you visited the night before. You know the feeling when all the cells in your body shoot to the surface of your skin and your heart plummets to your big toes? Yep, that's what I'm talking about. So, what have I done to counter this panic you'd like to know? Nothing. I mean, I did some laundry today. I had a beer at 2:30pm. I'm writing this blog entry. I took the kiddos to the park. I've stared at my pile of gear and supplies for a couple hours. But I haven't actually DONE anything to curb the consternation.

In case you didn't know it already, USPS will come pick up your mail at a scheduled time and take it away for you. When you're the support person for an AT thru-hiker and have three kids, a job and a spouse to tend to...this little factoid may be life-changing. My support person, Piper will just package up my little boxes full of delicious food and must have supplies, log into our USPS account, select a date and time, and it just happens. Sweet.

I will also utilize a "bounce box". Curious aren't you? OK, read on if you want your highbrow filled with this tidbit of wisdom. Skip to the next paragraphs if you're just that impatient. A bounce box is a box I will send "ahead" to my self. It will have my laptop, maybe some town clothes, repair supplies for my tent, sleep pad, extra stakes and ties, first aid happenings, you know, that kind of stuff. I'll send it to a town I know I'm stopping in and then send it up-trail about two or three weeks. I debated this option, but really want some pertinent items such as a razor, my laptop to upload the journal entries and pictures, and different clothes to be in while I'm restoring my body and mind in town.

I haven't figured out how I feel about all these logistics. I am aware, however, a person could potentially just wing the AT. You could, in theory, get on the trail with your pack and a dream and NOT starve to death or die of unbearable thirst. You don't have to carry maps. There are approximately 165,000 white blazes demarcating your way along the trail. Let's discuss how embarrassing it is to get lost on a trail that has blazes about every 70 ft for more than 2,000 miles. I would certainly ponder the thought of whether to enter that little morsel of my day into my blog. I imagine it happens more than any long-distance hiker would like to admit. And me, everyone that knows me, and possibly anyone that simple glances at me has to know I'm pre-tee terrible with direction. Particularly if the sun isn't out. Or I'm unable to see the sun. Or, say if I'm hiking in the GREEN TUNNEL and will possibly never see it. So, it could happen to me. It may certainly happen to me. I will leave it at that for now.

Back to the logistics. Who doesn't love a good spreadsheet? It's organized, long, filled with many nuggets of pre-thru-hike knowledge and will tell Piper where to send my resupply boxes. I can't complain about the little organizational wizard that is Excel. But do I actually like all this...the logistics of planning three months of my life in advance. It's kind of like imagining what you want to be when you grow up...a Pediatrician, Vet, astronaut...AND a rocket scientist. Let's be real here. How the hell do I know what I want to wear in September, four months from now, in Boston when I meet Tammy after my hike? I would typically just BUY new clothes. But then again, I typically have an income. Let's just say, I'm dealing with the logistics and I'll figure the rest out as I go.

I don't have to have all the answers. And I'm certainly not married to the ones I've already (surprisingly) made. This hike is about being with myself. It's about remembering and restoring my faith in humanity. It's about getting back to the basics. It's about being closer to my dad. I don't have all the answers. But I'll hike my own hike every day. Put one foot in front of the other and just experience every moment of it. Because three months is a blink of the eye. And I don't want to blink and be on the other side of this adventure not experiencing every single lovely, painful, amazing step. Bring on the logistics!

Happy Trails.

Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity. ~Unknown